Give a Helping Hand

Life hasn't been nice to me this week. In fact, the other day I walked out the door and told David that I hated my life.  "What in the world is wrong with you Jennifer? " that was me questioning myself as I drove down the highway headed for work. 

"I hate the drive." "I hate that I have to work, why can't I just be a stay at home mom?" "Why can't I just stay home and sew and bake and homeschool the kids?"

That was me. I sounded like a 2 year old who was told they couldn't have candy before supper. 

I made myself sick that I had an anxiety attack and had to come back home. 

Do you ever have those, "Why me?" "Why can't my life be perfect kind of days?" "Weeks?"

Mine turned into a whole week. A a whole week of not reading my Bible. 

A whole week of feeling sorry for myself and hating my life. 

I just gave the devil a great time by the way I behaved. And all along, God kept reminding me that he loved me. He kept telling me that Life isn't fair, but that he would never leave me. He kept trying to point out the good things in my life. 

                            Thing is I just kept distancing away from him even more. 

It wasn't until Friday that I took my 18 year old to get his ID. We talked on our way there and back and as always he asks me where I'm working and if I like it. I'm always eager to tell him, but this time I was so upset with the world that I didn't want to talk about it. As we continued to talk, he told me that he was so thankful for his new part-time job. He went on to tell me that most of the new people who were hired, only a few would be able to work full-time. He goes, "Mom, those people make $10.00 an hour and most of them have to get second jobs." He told me about the work, about washing dishes and being a server. I realized that God has always provided me the with best jobs. I just fail to see the blessings. I'm here upset about driving an hour to my job where some people not only have to drive far, but work so hard that one job isn't enough. 

I learned a very important lesson that day. And it wasn't some self-help book, it was my very wise 18 year old. "Mom, he says, Take the job. Anyone else would want an easy job like that. Just take it."

And so I did.  

As I ran later on that day, I met a turtle who was struggling to find his home. I noticed an algae patch on his shell, so I figured he needed water. I found a nearby area with water that I placed him down in the water and he just shooted off into the water. I could only imagine how happy he was. I ran an extra mile to get this little fella into the water.  

I think it would have taken an eternity for the turtle to walk a mile. And it would have been difficult walking through the Costco parking lot trying to get into the water.  This when God taught me a very important lesson about helping out others. Not only by being a Nurse, but by helping my children become independent, especially my 18 year old. 

That day when I placed the turtle into the water, I told God I would stop complaining. 

                                        

                                                   Everything's gonna be alright. 

    

                                   

Until Next Time, 

Eat Organic!

Eat Gluten-Free!

Jennifer 

I almost died Today

All that kept going through my head was,"What in the world are you doing?", "You're too old for this."

"You're not 18, or 25 anymore."

I can imagine what my neighbors thought as they saw me rollerblading through the neighborhood.   

As I was scanning through the skates at the store, an employee saw me trying them on and asked, "You skate?"

Of course I skate. Then I said a quick "Yes."

I do skate. Just haven't in 15 or more years. 

So as I hurried to put my skates on after my 4 1/2 mile run, Emily runs out and says, "Mom, don't do this."

                       What?

I've got this and I proceeded to show off my skills. 

I made it around the block went up a hill and realized that I was going to go faster downhill.

Something in me said "Take off the skates and walk down, but I ignored it. 

It was God, I believe.

So as I went down I felt my heart racing and thought I was going to die. I was going about 45 miles an hour and I couldn't stop.  There was a stop sign and I looked both ways. 

"Lord, please don't let me get hit by a car."

Fear gripped me. Then I decided to let go. I decided that I was going to enjoy the ride. And I did. I went up my driveway and stopped on the grass. No injuries. And it was the greatest feeling in the world. The wind, the sun, today was just a beautiful day. 

Are you afraid to do something because of fear?

God is always with us. I'm tired of the same boring run I do everyday. 

I love skating. I love the way it makes me feel free as I glide on my skates. And if I die, I know that Jesus will meet me as I enter the gates of heaven. 

                 I am not afraid. 

Until Next Time,

Eat Organic,

Eat Gluten-Free,

Jennifer 

Overwhelmed by You

4:30 a.m. Cancelled.  No other work. Go back to sleep and try to get at least another hour. Maybe I should go and run. Nope. I'm too tired. I go back to sleep and think about what our homeschool day will be like today since I will be home.  You see, the kids look forward to me working. They like it when they can look in their binders, pull out their daily schedule and start marking out all the tasks they have to do.  They love to work independently.  Seven years in the making, these kids know what is required of them.
I decide to wake up at 7 a.m. I'm going to start my day.  I quietly slip into my comfortable spot on the couch and decide to look at Facebook/Emails. What more could I do?  The kids are still sleeping.  David suggests I go for a run. Nope I say, I'm going to sit here depressed about work.  Nope, David makes me go.
I head to the trial.  I'm done after 3 miles.  I'm exhausted. Exhausted from thinking. Exhausted that we argued with our teenager yesterday.Exhausted that I don't have work. Exhausted because I'm depressed.

EXHAUSTED!!!!

Do you ever feel that you too are exhausted with just being?  

What about not knowing what tomorrow brings and knowing that you just have to trust that it will be a good day?

  I often think of tomorrow, but Jesus often told us not to worry about tomorrow.  

Do Not Worry

Luke 12:22-24

22 Then Jesus said to his disciples: “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. 23 For life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. 24 Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds!25 Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life[a]? 26 Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?

27 “Consider how the wild flowers grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 28 If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you—you of little faith! 29 And do not set your heart on what you will eat or drink; do not worry about it. 30 For the pagan world runs after all such things, and your Father knows that you need them. 31 But seek his kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well.

You see, I have no control over what the day will bring. Yes, I can plan, I can decide when/where to work and what to do with my day, but we need to trust that God has everything planned out.  As for work, I do have work. As for food, my fridge isn't empty. As for my teenager, I'm learning. As for being depressed, I have the maker of the universe looking down on me and giving me all his Love.  

At this moment, I am overwhelmed by God's Love for me.  I love this song.  Please listen. 

Look at the children. How happy they are with so little.  

Until Next Time, 
Eat Organic, 
Eat Gluten Free, 
Jennifer

Joy comes with the Morning

            I remember this day. 

Not too long ago I turned 35 and two weeks later, I found grey hair, more weight on me and just plain feeling depressed. I struggled the last two morning getting out of bed. I managed to run as usual. 

3 miles one day and 4 today. I realized that happiness is determined by my circumstances. In fact here is the definition of happiness and joy.

Happiness: the state of being happy.

When everything is going my way, I'm happy. 

Joy: the emotion of great delight or happiness caused by something exceptionally good or satisfying;keen pleasure; elation:

When I suffer, am depressed or when I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel, I'm going to have joy. 

Joy because Christ dwells in my heart. 

But then the Psalmist David said that joy comes with the morning. Do I just automatically receive it the moment the morning comes? Does God give us joy no matter what we are going through? 

The answer is yes. 

Joy comes from a deeper understanding. It comes from the depths of the soul. It's there when I'm depressed. It's there when I'm tired. It's there when I don't have enough work. It's there. I just have to reach it, to take hold of it and its mine. 

I have decided I'm going to have Joy.

I have decided that if I just had Christ alone, that he would be enough.

I have decided my circumstances don't determine who I am. 

I have abandoned happiness and replaced it with Joy. 

Psalm 30:5

Weeping may last through the night, but joy comes with the morning.

Until Next Time,

Eat Organic,

Eat Gluten-Free,

Jennifer 

The 10 Commandments

For the last year of so, as a homeschool family we have embarked on a journey into the Old Testament on the study of Exodus.  We are halfway through our book and we have continued to be in awe of the wonderful love God showed the Israelites.   I wonder if I had to endure all that the Israelites had to, would I still love the Lord and follow him with an obedient heart?

Of course I would, well, maybe. I honestly don't know.  I do know that running in this Texas heat doesn't come near to being in the wilderness with nothing but the clothes your are wearing and maybe a few extra things if I was able to carry them on the trip to the Promise Land. 

Okay, maybe if I knew that I would be well fed and sheltered.  But that's not what the Israelites encountered.  They had to trust God.  Now that takes a lot of faith.

Faith. It was that simple.  Look at what God did for them.

• (God) Parted the Red Sea
• (God) Gave them Heavenly Manna to eat
•  (God)Forgave them when they worshiped the Golden Calf
• (God) Gave them rules to abide by that would make their life so much easier.

Which brings me to this: 

Our study this last Sunday led us to the ten commandments. As I was driving home from church this past Sunday, I thought about all the signs and rules we follow as we drive to our destination.  The cops were especially watching that day as I made my way home.  If I don't follow the rules of the road, I could get a ticket.  An expensive one in fact. If I choose to not pay that ticket, I could go to jail.  

But what happens if I don't follow one of the ten commandments?  

Who will know if I broke one of them?  

Why would I need to tell anyone?  

Answer: I sin, God knows, You're right about that one. God knows.

Which then led me to think about the freedom we have here in America to choose our beliefs.   

Which come in the form of all the great teachers such as Muhammad, Gandhi, Confucius, gurus such as Yogananda, religious leaders such as The Pope, Joseph Smith and John Wesley with all their teachings and philosophies.  You have so many choices.  Why choose?  And if I do choose, who do I put my trust in? 

Answer: First Commandment

How about this saying, "God is within you, You are God."  Really?  That makes no sense to me. If I were God, I would have my life in order.  I wouldn't be depressed or sad. I wouldn't have doubts or fears or pain.  Isn't a God supreme?  Isn't a God all healing?  I'm definitely not Supreme and I am not all healing.  I can't even get out of bed sometimes. If I were a God, I would have enough strength to do such an easy task.  

Nope, I am not God. I don't ever want to believe that I am God.  Which brings me to the ten commandments and how we as Christians and also non-believers should live in this world.  

The Ten Commandments (with my viewpoint below)

1. I am the Lord thy God who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of bondage. 

There is no other.  God is number one. He is Supreme. Not Muhammad, Gandhi, The Pope,Joseph Smith or John Wesley. Those are people who share/who have shared their philosophies with the world.  We should not worship anyone of these.  

2. Thou shall have no other Gods before me.

Yup. Gods.  Meaning more than one.  For years I made running my god. Before I would even get out of bed, I would think about my run the next day.  I would wake up early in the morning, run, come home and continue on to my day. Now, I am not saying that we shouldn't do these things that we love, but we should make God first.  Now I get up early, read my Bible, pray and then run in the afternoon when my day is complete.  
Have you made money your God?  We can easily do this when we want to work and work  and not give to the body of Christ.  If you haven't committed your life to God, you can still give.  There's plenty of organizations that need your help. The homeless, the widows, people suffering from cancer.  Do not make money your God.

3.  Thou shall no take the name of the Lord thy God in vain. 

This is pretty simple.  Don't put God in the same sentence as a curse word.  Those two don't mix. 

4. Remember the Sabbath and keep it holy.  

God created the heavens and the earth in 6 days. On the seventh day he rested.  We should rest.  Some celebrate the Sabbath on a Saturday. Most of us, like myself celebrate it on Sunday.  

I don't work on Sundays due to this.  We should also make it a point to attend Sunday School as well.  Go to church. 

5. Honor your Father and your Mother. 

Our parents gave us life. They helped us to become who we are.  If you had a bad childhood, I'm Sorry.  Make it a point to reverse the cycle when you have children of your own.  Help your parents if your able. Give to them. They gave you so much and continue to.  If your parents are no longer on this earth, find someone you can adopt as your parents.  Give them your time.  Elderly people need our love. 

6. Thou shall not murder.

I always remember this as 6 6 6, the number of the beast.  Which means Satan.  All he wants to do is to destroy us.  He wants to rid us of this earth.  Too bad, he's already used many people to carry out his plan.  You can also murder with your words.  You can kill someones spirit by saying mean and unkind words that scar a person for life.  Choose your words wisely. 

7. Thou shall not commit adultery.

Is this a little too personal?  It's real.  Many families are destroyed due to adultery.  Even looking at another person with lustful eyes is adultery.  When we marry, we marry into the body of Christ.  Love your spouse with all your heart.  Let God's love fill your heart.  Do not destroy a sacred unity. 

8.Thou shall not steal.

Sure you didn't mean to take those extra set of pens from work.  Hey, you need them at home too?  Nope. That's stealing.  Leave what you weren't given at work. Even if it means you have to go to the store and buy your own set. If you didn't get permission from your boss to take them, then they are not yours.  We can also steal with our time.  Too much media, facebook, instagram and computer time steals time away from your family.  It steals time away from God. You could be reading your Bible, a book or helping a neighbor in need.  

9.  Thou shall not lie.

Many of you have heard of the term, White Lie.  A white lie is a minor or harmless lie. A fib.(and no, I don't mean A-fib, atrial fibrillation.  Ha!!!!)

Sure, I play jokes on my kids, but they know I'm joking around with them.  What happens if we decided that our moral code would include a white lie every once in awhile.  Well, in time, those white lies add up and we become liars.  People then start questioning our commitment to God.  If I say I am a Christian, I want to hold that truth up to the highest standard.  

10. Thou shall not covet.

Covet.  To want what someone else wants.  Sure, I've been longing for a baby for 2 years now. Every time I see a baby, I yearn to hold it.  I want one so bad.  When I obsess on that every waking moment of my life, I have not only created an injustice to myself, but to also my children who need me to physically be there for them.  

Although hugs from a  10 month old are a bit sweeter smelling, I'll take a hug from my smelly 13 year old any hour of the day.
( Just in case you didn't know this, Zach gives me 100 hugs a day).  

Be happy with what you have.  Be happy that no one else can do the things that you do, the way you do them.  And as much as I love babies, I am enjoying these moments with my kids where I don't have to chase after them 24/7.  We are all in different seasons of our lives. Embrace it. Enjoy it!

Today our memory verse comes form Psalm 128:1

Blessed is all who fears the Lord, who walk in his ways. 

(Click on the link below to listen to the song. Scroll down the page to Songs: Click to listen:

Song #9 Walk in his ways Psalm 128:1)

http://www.seedsfamilyworship.com/release/seeds-of-faith-vol-2/

Until Next Time, 

Eat Organic, 

Eat Gluten-Free,

Jennifer

Be Blessed!!!!

No One Knows

I ran till the sweat dripped.  Sprint it Jennifer. Run. Just be free.  Thoughts. Prayers.  Prayers for those hurting. Prayers for my dear friend who has a hole in her heart from losing her husband. Prayers for a baby born 4 weeks too soon. Prayers for myself.  Prayers for a hurting husband. Prayers for my family.  Prayers for a lost son who has left a deep pain in my heart.

No One Knows.  No one knows that at night I can't sleep. That I toss and turn. I think about my son.  I miss him.  Jesus tries to wake me up to pray, but I can't seem to focus.  There are times, I wake and am surrounded by a love that I just can't grasp.  A person that I can't see, but I believe he is there.  Cries.  Pleas.  Jesus, just show yourself to me.  Reveal yourself.  Silence.  Peace surrounds me and I go back to sleep.

I run. I see her. I see him. Walking down the path, living their lives.  Do they know?  I stop and talk to Levi, a young girl who is just walking home from work.  Rocky, who just got out of prison and is trying to see his children he left behind.  Jeremy who is walking to a job interview.  The list of people I can't remember.  Each have a story.  Each have a need. I stop and talk to each one.
I stop.

No One Knows. No one knows the burning feeling in my heart that I feel for others.  That I have this awakening of my soul that wants to tell the whole world about my faith. About how I love the creator of this earth and how he has been there every single hour, every single minute, every single breath I take.   For 18 years how I have this aching in my heart where I just want to heal the hurts of others, to tell them that it's just as easy as believing.

No One Knows.

Emily's Drawing she did on the computer.
It's not finished yet. 

Father's Day

Every Sunday I feel a sense of peace and happiness as I roll out of my bed, plant my feet on the ground and do a big stretch along with a "Thank You Lord for this day".  It's just been a ritual for me, oh, for the past 18 years of my life.

As a nurse you seem to work every schedule imaginable.  Recently I worked nights and found out that being a full-time Zombie wasn't something I wanted to do for the rest of my life.  I switched nights, went to work for an agency, which in essence means I can be off every Sunday.  Children's Sunday School followed by children's sermon today.   I talked to the kids about the importance of following our dad's wisdom and thanking their father's and grandfather's for the wisdom they instill in us.  I then followed it with a reading that my sister in law wrote about her father (my father-in law and pastor).  I'm going to share it below. 

I don't know what else to say that I haven't already said to my hubby.  He's such an amazing person in so many ways.

So, as I'll state below, I'll list the top 10 reasons why I'm thankful for my hubby.

1.  He makes me laugh.  No seriously. He could be a comedian if he wanted to.

2.  He's bionic. 

     He had 2 total hip replacements at the same time and
     by the 3rd week he was walking without any assistive device.

3.  He played in a band.  Bass Guitar. 

4.  He cooks. 

5.  He can draw. He's an artist.

6.  He loves to read.  

7.  He homeschools our kiddos.

8.  He's simple. 

9.  He loves cleanliness.

10.  He loves the Lord just as much as I do. 

Yes, its Father's Day and I get to tell him all these things, but he already knows.  All Dads are special in their own ways. Try to see the goodness in them (even the annoying habits) and thank God for giving us man.

Until Next Time, 

Eat Organic,
Eat Gluten-Free,
Eat Vegan!
Jennifer

Happy Friday

I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.

I can do all things through him who gives me strength.

Philippians 4:11-13

Paul certainly got the message.  In every situation he was in, he saw it at as an opportunity to point others to Christ.  He endured much suffering and his reward was great in heaven.  

Which brings me to the word Contentment. 

What does Contentment mean?  So lets see what the dictionary defines it as:

1. noun: a state of happiness and satisfaction.

"Jennifer found contentment in living a simple life in the country"

The other day at Costco (no I wasn't running), I met a lady at the checkout stand who complimented me on how lovely the shirt I was wearing was. "Yes, my favorite shirt." I replied, then I went on to tell her that it reminds me that Life Is Good.  Yes, I was wearing a Life is Good tee (my favorite t-shirt) with a peace sign on it.  I went on to tell her that life is good not matter what, that we can choose to be Happy or we can choose to be Grumpy.  In unison we said, I choose to be Happy.  She laughed and then I went on my merry way to the food court to get myself a strawberry sundae.  

Until Next Time, 

Eat Organic, 

Eat Gluten-Free, 

Jennifer